Bitten by the “life” bug!

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Self-discovery

I was fortunate enough to be able to go on an amazing holiday and the one thing the holiday made me realise is that I want more for myself. I was strangely content with the simple life I was living and I had put to rest any big dreams I once had for myself, but now that those dreams, wants and needs are back I don’t think it’s something you can put aside and ignore forever. I also, however, arrived back to chaos in South Africa. In three weeks the economy and country seems to have gone up in smoke and I am trying very hard to console myself and still march forward with making something of myself.

I saw these monuments and amazing dedications to great people who have influenced history and made their mark on the world and it may seem silly for me to dream that big, but my imagination is the one place where the world really is my oyster! I live in my very own delusional, idealistic world and I’d like to share it with everyone who lives in the real world, because perhaps reality has become a big, black hole that is sucking us in one by one.

I think I am done wishing things could be easier. I am not going to be able to click my heels together and arrive in some fantastical land. It takes a bit of time, hard work and dedication to make it to where you want to be; so be it! The only thing that terrifies me is that after a few weeks of being stuck back in to my routine that I forget about all of this. Is that what happens? We return to being complacent with our existence as we were before? I sincerely hope not 🙂

Tell me about your little journey of self-discovery… I love to hear about things like that!!!

ME

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4 responses »

  1. After spending a lot of time wondering what it means to have made it, or to make it in life I one day discovered that its all about self preservation and self worth… that’s when you know what makes you and what it is to have made it. When you can stand there and say you have made an impact.

    That day came a few months after joining up with the local volunteer rescue team in Durban, and spending time with everyone training and going through the motions of everything… That day was when we got a call to find a missing off road motor biker, who had gone missing earlier that day whilst out riding with friends.

    When we all arrived at the scene we were met by desperate friends and even more desperate parents of the missing biker, and that’s when the excitement of a “real rescue” became very real, and it sunk in that this isn’t a TV show and its real feelings at heart.

    Unfortunately after many hour searching for the missing biker I had the unlucky experience of discovering our missing person sadly no longer alive. The reality of everything sunk in when I was faced by his father who knew that it was the worst news he could imagine before I even said anything…

    But the humbling part of it all was the gratitude that he showed and the thanks that he extended towards us for the work we did.

    We attended the funeral and chatted to the parents afterwards who once again both during the ceremony and afterwards thanked us profusely for putting our time aside to do what we did.

    That whole experience made me realise that I have made it, I made an impact on someones life and they were eternally grateful for it for doing something that I considered to be part and parcel of my existence…

    Find your happy medium and enjoy it….

  2. This post stirred so much emotion in me. It’s as if I’m going through something similar. I’ve suddenly woken up and started to take control of my life but at the same time, feeling as if things are moving on without me, mostly because I never put my hand up before to say what I thought. Glad you enjoyed your trip!

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