Paying for dates!


Call me old-fashioned, but as far as I am concerned it is up to the guy to pay for the first date; whether the date is dinner, a movie, a coffee or whatever! I am aware that different people have different opinions when it comes to who should pay, but the majority of women agree that it is up to the man. If you want to enter the friend zone and forever be remembered as that fool who made the girl pay then split the bill with a girl on your date or leave her to pay for everything. It is basic instinct for a woman to want a man who can offer her security and part of that security includes financial security. We want to know that the man is capable of looking after us as well as himself and paying for your date says volumes about the type of man you are. I know things have changed and there are women out there who are perfectly happy to pay for themselves, but the majority rules and I recommend that the men pull up their socks and start paying for shit again! That is obviously not aimed at the men who actually do make an effort when they take a girl out. I am going to shed some light on this whole situation with real life examples.

I remember being asked out by this one guy and to save him the stuttering I suggested we go for a midday drink.  STRIKE ONE. When we were out he decided it was appropriate to blurt out this long, dull speech about how women want to be equal so why should men pay for dates. STRIKE TWO. After I paid for myself (STRIKE THREE to INFINITY) after a very quick drink he still had the nerve to dare ask me if I would date him.  My answer was ‘a world of hell no, because I only split the bill with my friends.’ If he felt that way he should not have stuttered like a fool to ask me out and waste his time, because I would have saved him the rejection had he told me he was a cheap skate. If you have stupid views like that please share them before you expect a girl to waste her time and money.

Another no-go I was told about was a guy saying he would go and draw money to pay for the meal. STRIKE ONE. After the bill arrived he still sat there saying that. STRIKE TWO.  My friend ended up paying for his meal. STRIKE THREE to INFINITY. If you want a girls opinion of you to drop to the point of no return then that is how you should behave. In all honesty if you wanted to go and draw money you would have done so before you went out. More to the point it is actually possible to swipe your card in a restaurant so that whole ‘I will go and draw money’ nonsense is a terrible excuse for ‘I am a cheap skate.’ That is just as bad as calculating what each party should pay when the bill arrives and telling the girl how much she needs to contribute. We do judge you on whether you pay or not no matter how independent we are. If the woman insists on paying for at least her share it means you are just friends.

When it comes to special occasions, such as Valentines day, as much as we tell you we hate it, we still want you to make an effort when that day comes around. Unless you have been in a relationship for longer than a year the guy should get up off his lazy butt and make you feel special! I know of men (I use the word men, but what I really want to say is chauvinistic, brainless idiots) who have actually told their girlfriends who they have not been dating for long that if they want to have a special day then they must organize it (STRIKE ONE) and pay for it (STRIKE TWO AND THREE). When a man does that you take the bastard out and you break up with him in the restaurant and leave him to pay for everything.

Some men have this crazy idea that if they pay for dinner they expect sex afterwards (STRIKE ONE, TWO, THREE and to INFINITY). Please give girls fair warning if that is how you feel about it, because I guarantee that no self-respecting girl would sleep with you just because you paid for a meal. To all the men out there who have this ridiculous expectation I suggest you punch yourself for being a jack-ass. Since when does paying for dinner suddenly mean a guy can expect a girl to get in to bed with him? I can assure you that any decent girl would rather not go out with you or with an ultimatum like that they would rather pay their own way. If you want to pay for sex go pick up a prostitute.

A man paying for the date is simply considered good manners. The only expectation should be another date if things go well. It is not our way of getting a free meal out of you it is just our way of sussing out the trash from the decent guys. If a man willingly allows you to pay for just about every meal then there is a problem and he is probably just using you. If you want to see where their loyalty lies all you do is make them pay for a meal or two and see how bitter they become because of it. I am not saying the girl should never have to pay, but at the beginning it should be up to the guy. If you have any other stories to share about men who do not pay for dates please do!



7 responses »

  1. I agree… In my ‘guy’ opinion, things have become to money driven and the idea of being a romantic or acting in a chivilrous way is somewhat of a myth. It doesn’t and should never matter what the first date is, the guy should always pay. There’s no two ways about it! Women should always be treated in my opinion. Obviously your status in your relationship whether a new relationship or a few months or years old dictate how you handle things, but I think by default, the guy should always pay.. Nice post!

    • It is so nice to get a guys point of view on this and it shows that there are men out there who believe in treating women the right way without expectations. Thank you for commenting and for reading! It is appreciated.

  2. I believe a man should always pay. I also believe that a woman should be submissive, do laundry, cook and clean. Fair enough?

    • That just seems like tit for tat… but I guess the only way you would think that is because you were brought up that way. So I will settle for blaming the Neanderthal male role model you had in your life that led you to believe a women is there to do your bidding and be your skivvy.

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