Pick-up lines should NEVER work!

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Some guys have these ridiculous pick-up lines they tend to use on girls and when I hear some of the absurd nonsense guys come up with I think, ‘Has that ever actually worked for you?’ I am sure there are some random stories out there of these things actually working, but as far as I am concerned if you are hitting on an even slightly intelligent girl she should pick it up straight away. So it’s not because of your lame pick-up lines that you score, it’s because she also wants some ass and you seem like the best out of the lot she has been exposed to for the night. No offense. I guess we should blame alcohol for making the guys so brave they will walk up to a girl and say what they may think is really witty and suave, but in actual fact replay that moment when you are sober and even you will be shocked. As if pick up lines were not bad enough then some guy (Neil Strauss) has to go and write a book called ‘The Game’ similar to Barney’s pick up book in  How I met Your Mother and now I see you can find Barney’s ‘play book’ in stores! Is it that difficult to talk to a girl and if it is just a game then why go to all that effort to get a girls attention?

I remember standing at the bar waiting to order a drink and the guy next to me had a tequila shot. He asked if I had salt and I was so puzzled by the request, I just said um, no. He said ‘I’m going to ask you one more time, do you have salt?’ I was pretty annoyed at this after being so polite that I snapped at him: ‘Do I look like I have salt you freaking weirdo!’ All I wanted was a drink. Now this is the part that will make you cringe and shudder… he then went on to tell me that your body secretes salt so if he licks my neck it will be salty. I am not joking, not even a little bit. Even with my ‘you have got to be kidding me’ expression on my face he asked me again for salt, but this time he asked if he could lick my neck. I did not need my drink that badly. Someone explain to me how that works? I know not all pick up lines are as lame as that one, but none of them are very good. Also, what is it with guys quoting pick-up lines from the movies? Hello, this is reality, it is not scripted to work on random girls. Guys always wonder how the shy, quiet guy always manages to hook up… because girls love the chase!

Do girls use pick-up lines? I do not think I have ever used a pick-up line and if I did it was by accident or on purpose to look stupid. Give me a couple of drinks and you don’t need to tell me how to make a fool of myself. Give most people alcohol and they will willingly drag their own name through the mud. You will even find a guy will build up the courage to walk up to you and try to put his hand up your dress or down your top. Never happened to you? I must be hanging out in some dodge places then, because it has happened to me. Not only does that not work, but the only result is that the girl will be super pissed off. Also, if a girl mentions a boyfriend at any point what she is saying is ‘You’ve struck out so jog on.’  Sometimes it’s true and she does have a boyfriend, other times it is to get rid of you. That comment tends to come out when a guy starts getting in your personal space. My favorite is when I was out with my best friend and this guy pulled one from that book ‘The Game.’ She told me right away via bbm what it was all about and all I could think was what a  sad, pathetic loser.

I want to hear more of the lame pick-up lines guys come up with! I want to know how they worked or back-fired and I am sure everyone else does as well. I know I took a real dig at the guys on this one, but I think you needed to know that pick-up lines are just another way to make yourself look like a tool. Girls, guys, I know you have stories… juicy, juicy stories… so tell me more!

ME

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3 responses »

  1. If I’ve ever used a pickup line it was inadvertent. I used to just smile and dance with my friends. Normally girls would then join in and I would then start dancing closer. 6/10 times that would work for me. I have, however said some pretty corny things after sex 😀 I’m very blunt when making my desires and intentions know. I think women, not girls, appreciate men that know what they want.

  2. Always an interesting topic this. The basic problem is that most people — guys and girls — have no clue as to how attraction really works. Think about it: guys get told they need to be nice to women and women end up falling for bad boys.

    Attraction isn’t a choice. Once you get that, pick up lines start making sense. Being smart about dating starts making sense.

    And there is a world of difference between “The Game” and “Barney’s Playbook”…the latter is nothing more than a comedy routine taken from the TV show. The Game works.

    I have met a few of the people that are featured in “The Game” and it’s like seeing magic for the 1st time.

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